Always In His Sight

(Side note before you read any further; I have been working on this since October 2013.  I really don't know why it has taken this long but I've chosen to wait on God for the words and He chose for it to come together in this way. My trust is in Him and that He'll use this tough spot in my life for His glory.)

It feels like it happened just yesterday. I didn't know my heart could be put through so much. I don't understand why it happened, why it had to be you or even why it had to be cancer. But even if I had the answers to my seemingly unending questions of "why", it would never bring healing to my hurting and broken heart. Ya see, it was in the early morning hours of August 25th, 2013 that my Grandpa went to be with Jesus after battling stage four brain cancer for two years. Words can't even scratch the surface of just how special he was to me or even of how greatly I miss him here. The day he physically died, was the day I lost the one earthly father figure I've had in my nineteen years of life who didn't walk out on my family.

I know that I will have times where I'll cry because I miss him and it won't be easy. But what doesn't hurt is that I am absolutely convinced that he is with the Lord now and for eternity in perfect health. I will miss him here but at the same time my heart rejoices that he's no longer suffering because of the cancer.

Shortly after he passed, I found myself faced with the overwhelming emotions of being lost and empty. I had struggled with a very real, very overwhelming sense of being fatherless in the earthly sense. But I had to pull my thoughts and emotions together and remind myself that I am NOT fatherless at all. I have a Heavenly Father who has never left me; He knows every detail of my life and He loves me unconditionally. It is His love alone that has gotten me through the absence of my Dad, my parents divorce, Dad's re-marriage, Grandpa's brain cancer and his death.

It is this same God who is ready, willing and more than able to get you through whatever it is that you're facing right now. I know it's hard and that it seems impossible to ever get through it but it's not! There is hope, healing, forgiveness, grace and mercy in Jesus. 

I know that life will upend you but so will love. It changes everything. That's why it's so important that we don't allow for our joy (happiness) to be based on our circumstances. Our joy must be rooted in the One who is the same yesterday today and forever; Jesus. He's the one who loves you more than anyone. 

So with that said, may your heart be encouraged in knowing that you are always in His sight.

~ Katelyn