To Know You, Lord

A few weeks back, I was in my room most likely trying to clean it, and i had the radio set on a Christian station, and I heard in the background that a Casting Crown's song was on... I've never heard this song before, but I can identify the singers voice pretty well. The song was 'To Know You' and I think they've been reading my journal or something, because this song is exactly how I feel. Hearing this song for the first time and still playing it, is still powerful and makes me think.

To know You is to hear Your voice when You are calling
To know You is to catch my brother when he is falling
To know You is to feel the pain of the brokenhearted
‘Cause they can’t live without You

More than my next breath
More than life or death
All I’m reaching for,
I live my life to know You more
I leave it all behind, You’re all that satisfies
To know You is to want to know You more
To know You is to want to know You more

This song made me think of my next school year and if I truly am willing to do this whole campus ministry thing. To be honest, I really do not care about the meetings that we'd do, just give me those students and let's just go and do and what Jesus has said that we need to do.

"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit," Matthew 28:19


To know You is to never worry for my life
To know You is to never give into compromise and
To know You is to want to tell the world about You
‘Cause I can’t live without You

To know You is to hear Your voice when You are calling
To know You is to catch my brother when he is falling
To know You is to feel the pain of the brokenhearted
‘Cause they can’t live without You

I have no idea what God has planned for me or these last two years of high school that I have left... but whatever it may be, I'm still going to be trusting in God. I may not know what God has planned, but I do know one thing, that commitment that I made before my sophmore year, I'm going to keep it for the rest of my life. That commitment is to simply love those other teens at my high school with the love that Jesus has for us. All the things that have happened my sophmore year, I couldn't handle them without God right there with me even when I felt alone He still proved to me He never left.

I know I've been through a lot, and that this year has been really hard on me, but what about those teens who have to go through hell everyday because no one seems to be paying any attention to them. You know they try to get our attention, and have a cry for help, that we just seem to be missing it.

We should hear their desperate cry for hope, for meaning, for life... but we don't. It's just far too easy to ignore those who are hurting, those who are dressed poorly, those whose makeup has been smeered on their faces, those who stand on the street corners with the 'Homeless and Hungry' signs that we see everyday. I think we all know that they're there, we just don't have the guts enough to step up and do something about it. We don't want to be labeled UNcool, do we? No. But, as a Christian, I don't care what people think about me, because at the end of the day, God's word is all that matters to me... and we need to take it seriously.

I remember moving here in the summer of 2009, and freaking out about what my new high school would be like and if I'd be "left out". The thoughts I had scared me... I didn't know what was goig to happen... and then me and my mom went to go look at the school the first day when freshman start before everyone else, and the size of the building made me nervous...and going inside didn't help with that feeling. I had my hands on my stomach the entire time we were there that day. It freaked me out. Going inside made me feel small, and then later learning how many students there are, made me feel like an ant... there's 1,400 students... and I'm just one out of all the 1,400.

I tried to start a campus ministry that year, didn't really work... i'm kind of glad because my sophmore year sucked. It didn't suck as bad as I thought it would... I made friends faster than I thought I would... but I'm still shy. Sometimes, I'd like to think that because I'm shy, the job won't get done... and students won't get reached with the message and mission of Jesus. And then again, I really think I'm wrong. I think that God's odd and loves using the unlikely and the uncool to become unafraid and unashamed of the Gospel and then are unleashed and actually do get the job done.

After all, God doesn't call the qualified, but He qualifies the called.

If God can use Moses (a studering shepard) and all the others that He chose to use in the bible, then He'll use me... a shy teenage girl in kansas city.





I'm stoked for Junior year!

- Katelyn